October 4th, 2011

no words for tendou

i didn't get a department email, but then again i didn't want it, so

among other newses presented to me yesterday, was the news that Mizushima Hiro is now a female model. what the everloving fuck. you know, the last couple weeks have really been shitastic to say the least, but when you starting fucking around with Mizushima Hiro, that is just too far goddammit.

As if sensing that it had completely overstepped its bounds, at least the universe coughed up the new ONE OK ROCK album right before bed which, as i didn't preorder it and forgot that it existed, was a nice surprise. I got to be emo in my car with Taka this morning if nothing else, and I like it a lot. As much as I like Kisumai's single, it's not satisfying to be depressed while listening to it; OOR was a big improvement. But that still doesn't make up for Mizushima Hiro.

usually when I'm depressed, not like fleetingly sad for a day or two but honestly depressed, I sleep a lot. Today i came home from school fully intending to nap on my couch, and couldn't. I didn't sleep well last night either, but it isn't like usual where I want to be watching TV or tooling about online instead of sleeping. Evidently what I actually want to do is lie here in a dim room under a blanket and just be depressed. awesome. Tomorrow is first department meeting of the year, so I'm hoping I'll feel a little better after that's over with.

I'm also hoping i can stop getting emails about how I was one minute late entering the junior high building. god, fuck the junior high, man. I'm not even supposed to be working over there! I feel the fact that I'm continuing to put on my grownup pants and show up to my grownup job, despite the fact that so far this year my grownup job is dicking me over at every turn, is really all that anybody ought to expect of me at this particular moment.

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