But I did call them, and i give them my eight million numbers, and they are running down the list of things I did with the Visa, and I'm rolling my eyes. But then finally they get to "What about $750 at Wal-mart?" and after a second of stunned silence I have to admit, no, that indeed was not me. But my card isn't lost or anything, so it looks like they had a fake card with my number? Totally strange.
So the guy says they'll stop the card, and for one, single, shining moment, I was at last pleased with Visa fraud. Thank you for looking into things and accomplishing something useful!
And then reality started up again and he was like "of course you'll have to call your bank and sort it all out for real immediately."
me: "You know it's 5pm on a Saturday right? That nobody will be at my bank until Monday morning?"
Visa: "yeahhhhhhhhh...they're closed. That's a shame for you. Have a nice day~"
me: "kdflafdalfjaslfk DAMN YOU VISA MY ETERNAL RIVAL."
I wish they'd at least tell me what the guy bought at the Walmart for $750. I mean, at a Walmart, that'd probably take you pretty far. What the hell planet is in charge of identity theft, because JESUS that planet is in retrograde this week. Fuck me.
ETA: and monday is a holiday too. I forgot because I am not in fact off. GOOD TIMES.