Rating/Warnings: PG! Except for one 'fuck.'
Summary: Koyama and Shige have agreed on a rational decision and have a happy ending. Until everybody else gets ahold of it.
AN: For lyto because she has trouble telling when fics are happy, and for peroxidepest17 who mails me awesome things and probably agrees with Shige hardest of all.
The One Where Koyashige Are Happy
When Koyama and Shige agree that it would be best just to be friends, they’re both pretty happy with the decision.
“I’d just end up feeling guilty about neglecting you for school and forgetting all our anniversaries,” Shige admits sheepishly.
“Honestly, I’m relieved,” Koyama laughs. “My mother was starting to ask me embarrassing questions, ne.”
Koyama hugs Shige, and Shige kisses Koyama’s cheek, and then they both go about their business, feeling that all is right with the world.
Apparently they are the only ones.
“Shige,” Tegoshi makes the biggest, most sympathetic eyes that Shige has ever seen when Shige arrives to work the next morning, “I’m sorry things didn’t work out.”
“They didn’t?” Shige frowns, putting a hand to his hair and wondering if telling the stylist to cut half an inch off instead of a quarter was too much. “What things?”
“You know, things!” Tegoshi insists, looking even more sympathetic. When Shige continues to blink at him, Tegoshi clarifies, “With Kei-chan.”
“Things are fine with Koyama.” Shige frowns harder, wondering just how much Koyama tells Tegoshi, adorable kouhai or not. “How do you know anything about that, anyway?”
Tegoshi sighs sadly and hugs Shige. “Don’t worry, Shige-chan, things will work out between the two of you sooner or later. Believe!”
“But,” Shige calls after Tegoshi as Tegoshi skips off, satisfied that his work here is done, “we already worked them out!”
Tegoshi doesn’t seem to hear him, and Shige sighs and reaches up to pat his hair again.
“It’s for you,” Masuda insists when Koyama stares blankly at the pudding that’s been dropped into his hands with no warning. It’s chocolate, which Koyama enjoys, but Masuda’s been heard frequently to remark that there’s not enough pudding in the world to go around frittering it away.
“Thank you?” Koyama finally asks.
“It’s to cheer you up,” Masuda explains, giving Koyama a hopeful smile. “Chocolate is best for broken hearts.”
Koyama scrunches his brow. “I don’t…”
“You don’t have to talk about it, ne,” Masuda rushes to reassure Koyama, patting him on the shoulder. “Wait until you’re ready.”
“But…” Koyama tries again.
“Meanwhile, we’ll love you enough for Shige too.” Masuda hugs Koyama tightly enough that Koyama barely manages to keep from having pudding exploded all over his shirt, and can’t draw in a deep enough breath to argue further.
“I go to Kansai for two days,” Ryo snaps when he strolls into the quiet room Shige has found to study in, “and you break up with Koyama?!”
“Break up with…” Shige jerks his head out of his law book and glares at Ryo. “We weren’t going out!”
“I always knew you were a dog,” Ryo sneers, making Shige splutter, “but Koyama? I ought to knock that egghead right off your shoulders, you jackass.”
“Hey!” Shige snaps back, because dammit, he’s got a test to study for and also everything is fine. “I didn’t do anything to Koyama!”
“Nothing he didn’t ask for, you mean?” Ryo demands, making Shige’s jaw drop. “You’re disgusting, Shigeaki. I can’t even stand to be in the same room with you.”
Ryo storms out as quickly as he came in, Shige almost too flustered to yell after Ryo that he can go fuck himself.
“I heard the news,” Nakamaru says at the next Shounen Club practice, making Koyama throw up his hands in exasperation. “Tough break, Kei-chan. But don’t worry, there’s somebody for everybody.”
“Nakamaru-kun,” Koyama pleads, “listen, nothing happened between Shige and I. Everything’s fine, okay?”
“That’s the spirit, keep the game face on!” Nakamaru encourages, slapping Koyama on the back. “Maybe Shige’ll even get a little jealous, right?”
“It’s not a game face, it’s my face!” Koyama wails, beginning to grow genuinely distressed. “I’m really happy this way!”
“Koyama-kun always works hard no matter what.” Nakamaru gives Koyama another smile and stands up. “I’ll give you a moment to collect yourself, and you just come out when you’re ready, okay?”
At this point Koyama is really starting to wonder if maybe he isn’t happy this way, since everybody else is so convinced about it. And then he turns around and finds Kyomoto Taiga, Yamashita Reon, and Tanaka Jyuuri holding up homemade “FEEL GENKI SOON” cards.
“Have you lost your mind?” Kusano wants to know, voice crackling over the distance of the phone connection, the sounds of a busy city street in the background.
“Have you lost yours?!” Shige demands. It’s one thing for his friends who are in Japan to abuse him for free, but it’s a whole new level for one of them to pay an astronomical connection fee to do it from another continent.
“Go tell Kei-chan you love him right now,” Kusano orders, sounding bored as if this is the sort of phone call he makes routinely. “Go on, shoo.”
“WE WEREN’T GOING OUT,” Shige roars into the phone, ignoring the people glaring at him in the library. “WE DIDN’T BREAK UP! WE AGREED IT WAS BEST AND WE’RE BOTH VERY, VERY HAPPY!”
"Tsk," the girl at the next table says in disgust. "Men."
“Mm-hm,” Kusano says. “Kei-chan, now. Love, yo.”
Shige hangs up on him, but gets kicked out of the library anyway.
“And don’t come out until you’ve got it all worked out,” Yamapi says sternly, then shuts the cleaning supply closet’s door firmly.
The lock clicks and Koyama and Shige stare at each other. Sort of.
“You’d think he could have at least locked us in a closet with a light,” Shige snaps, cranky after several days of repeated attempts by every known member of the Jimusho to fix his not-broken love life. He really feels that romantic advice from TOKIO is something nobody should ever have to endure.
“Shige?” Koyama asks, voice small, and he reaches out to grab Shige’s arm as if to make sure of where he is. “Do you think they’re right?”
“No!” Shige replies without thinking. “We already talked about it!”
“But,” even without the light, Shige knows Koyama is chewing on his lower lip, “everyone seems so convinced, ne. What if they’re right, and we really aren’t happy at all?”
“That’s ridiculous,” Shige sighs, trying to reach out to pat Koyama’s shoulder and poking him in the face instead. He slides his hand down Koyama’s neck until his hand is in the right place. “We’re the only ones who know if we’re happy or not.”
Koyama chews his lip some more.
“I didn’t mind the embarrassing questions, really,” he says after a moment. “And I could always remind you about the anniversaries.”
“Whoa, whoa,” Shige backpedals. “Are you suggesting that we…just give in to them?”
“And you’ll be busy with school!” Koyama adds with a coaxing air. “You’ll be too busy to go on dates or sleep over or anything!”
“This is ridiculous,” Shige says again, but more weakly.
“Please?” Koyama asks, voice earnest. “I can’t eat anymore pudding, Shige.”
Shige sighs, thinks about the tribulations of the last few days, and gives into the inevitable. “Well…if it’s Kei-chan…I mean, it isn’t like I’ve got time for girls anyway…”
“Yay!” Koyama hugs Shige, and Shige kisses Koyama’s cheek on reflex, and just then Yamapi opens the door and beams at them before announcing to everyone else that the problem is solved.
Koyama wonders quietly whether Shige might manage to sleep over sometimes, just for show, and Shige whimpers.