Title: Yoku Asobi Yoku Manabe (Play a Lot, Study a Lot) [Sanada/Nozawa, Miyadate/Watanabe]
Rating/Warnings: PG-13 for Nabesho's study habits.
Summary: What with Sanada and Nozawa refusing to be boyfriends, and Miyadate and Watanabe being boyfriends all the effing time, Sakuma's finding that being the leader of the official Snowmen study group is not all it's cracked up to be.
AN: Written for littlemelonblue for the 2010 JE Holiday exchange. Thanks to timeripple and also shimizumiki, but no thanks to the magazines, which can't seem to agree whether it's 'Fukasawa' or 'Fukazawa.' I demand standardized romaji! Title from the NYC single. Most of the Snowmen are legal as of December. OH NOEZ.
Yoku Asobi Yoku Manabe
"I hereby call the first meeting of the official Snowmen 'Let's Get into University Yay!' study group to order!"
Sanada and Miyadate just stare at Sakuma; Watanabe beams.
"I added the 'Yay!'" he informs them. Sanada and Sakuma look at Miyadate.
"I had to get him to come along somehow," Miyadate says, busying himself putting lead into his new mechanical pencils.
"Hey, I couldn't bring my boyfriend!" Sanada protests.
"First of all, you still haven't confessed properly," Watanabe points out, "which means you aren't boyfriends. At best you're friends with occasional groping benefits."
"Your face has occasional groping benefits," Sanada retorts, making Sakuma and Miyadate both cringe.
"Secondly," Miyadate says, "your boyfriend hates studying. And school. And fangirls." Miyadate pauses. "And everything."
"He likes pasta! And sometimes me!"
"Ladies," Sakuma cuts in, already rubbing at his forehead, "is there any chance we might study during our official meeting of the 'Let's Get into University' study—"
"Yay!" Watanabe interrupts.
Sakuma takes a calming breath. "The 'Let's Get into University YAY,'" he eyes Watanabe, who just beams at him guilelessly, "study group?"
"Can we start with math?" Miyadate asks. "I can't pass any of the math sections in my practice exam book."
"I passed one yesterday!" Sanada starts digging through his stack of study guides, and triumphantly pulls out one with a folded paper marking the page. He opens the book and smoothes out his practice test proudly, the other three leaning in to see.
"Congratulations," Sakuma says, "now you qualify for…Keio Junior High."
"At least you have a safety school," Watanabe assures a downcast Sanada, patting his shoulder.
It was either Sanada or Miyadate's idea to start with, both of them sufficiently panicked about entrance exams and self-aware enough to know what would happen if they didn't set up some sort of system. It's Sakuma who sets up the schedule, in and around and sometimes during their Snowmen schedules.
"Leader's great!" Miyadate says with awe when Sakuma hands them the schedules; Sanada just wibbles up at Sakuma gratefully.
"You won't think it's so great when everybody else is hanging around in A.B.C.-Z's dressing playing pin the pants on the Hashimoto and we're doing trigonometry."
Sanada stops wibbling at Sakuma and starts wibbling at the schedule. "That really won't be great."
"It's fine for him," Miyadate rolls up his schedule and thwacks Sanada across the back of the head. "The only university Hasshi could get into would be Tokyo School of Doing it Up the Butt with Senpai."
"I hear they have nice housing," Sanada sighs, and Miyadate goes on hitting him until Watanabe pops up suddenly and says that it sounds like something good is going on over here.
"Here," Miyadate unrolls his schedule and shoves it into Watanabe's hands. "Copy this down, you're studying with us too."
"University exaaaaams," Watanabe gives Miyadate pleading eyes, and Sanada and Sakuma both have to look away to avoid his pout. "Do I have to?"
Miyadate seems unaffected, no doubt from long exposure. "Yes. We've gone to school together since kindergarten and you have to get into the same school as me so we can spend the night at each other's houses doing homework still." Watanabe blinks at Miyadate. "You know, homework. Aaaaall night."
Watanabe blinks some more. "But we don't do—"
"We'll leave you to convince him then," Sakuma says hurriedly, snagging Sanada's arm and dragging him out the dressing room door. "Don't be late to practice!"
"Yeah, Leader," Watanabe says, distracted. "But exams are so far away! Can we at least have a cool group name?"
The door swings shut, leaving Sakuma and Sanada making faces at each other. Sanada starts, "I wish they wouldn't be so…"
"Horribly gay for each other?" Sakuma suggests, then snorts. "Good luck with that, since they got married on the playground in the third grade. And speaking of that, I didn't invite Nokkun, but if you wanted…"
"He definitely won't come." Sanada shakes his head. "You know he isn't serious about it."
"Not even if he just comes along to hang out with youuu?" Sakuma suggests, making Sanada glare.
"Stoppit, don't." Sanada takes a swing at Sakuma's shoulder, but there isn't much force behind it. "And you better not say anything to him again, either."
"Just confess and I won't have to!" Sakuma bats away Sanada's hand. "You like him! He likes you! You've made out on multiple occasions!"
"That's different," Sanada protests, but he sounds sad, rather than annoyed. "That's just fooling around, everybody does that. My mom says it's perfectly normal."
"Your mom," Sakuma repeats flatly, but then as Leader chooses to avoid mention of exactly how normal he's sure Sanada-san is, having spawned Sanada-kun.
"Your mom," Sanada replies defensively.
They reach the practice room at that moment, conversation stopping while Sakuma yanks the door open and pushes Sanada through, and they're not even two steps into the room when Nozawa calls across it for Sanada to hurry up and come help him stretch.
"He likes you," Sakuma insists, facing Sanada with his hands on his hips. "Just tell him!"
Staring at his sneakers, Sanada mumbles that it's not easy like that before trotting over to Nozawa's side. Sakuma just shakes his head, but before he can do anything else, the door slams open behind him, scaring the daylights out of him, and then he's nearly run over by a red-cheeked Watanabe and a Miyadate with two obvious fist-scrunch marks in his T-shirt.
They focus on math for the first couple meetings, a weak point for nearly all of them, and just keep on revising and retaking practice exams until everybody is at least scraping a pass. By popular vote, they move on to English next, since their job as jyannis is actively undermining their attempts at scholarship.
"I'd like to washing the laundries?" Kitayama demands during a lunch break when Miyadate and Watanabe plead for help. "Where the hell do you even learn this?" His righteous indignation is interrupted by Fujigaya strolling up to tell him the choreographer wants him, wearing a T-shirt which reads "I'd like to loving, baby."
"Homework? Tcht, cute," Fujigaya remarks after a token glance at the paper, and then casually tweaks Watanabe's nipple on the way by. Watanabe looks longingly after him, and then turns accusing eyes to Miyadate. His accusations only increase when Fukasawa and Iwamoto return from Kis-My-Ft2's dressing room with mussed hair and break down into giggles whenever somebody mentions Senga or Tamamori.
"This is too haaard," Watanabe whines at their next meeting, letting his cheek hit the table. "I'm too pretty now to work this hard."
"Stop complaining," Sakuma scolds, tapping Watanabe's nose with the end of his pencil. "Your score went up four points this time."
"I'm still only getting twenty-two out of fifty." Watanabe sighs, and then adds more softly. "I don't think I can do this."
"Hey," Miyadate leans over to brush Watanabe's hair out of his eyes. "Of course you can. I can do it, and I'm just as stupid as you!"
"Is he giving a pep talk?" Sanada whispers to Sakuma, and Sakuma shushes him.
"You think so?" Watanabe asks Miyadate, then gives a tiny smile when Miyadate answers of course he's sure, idiot. "Well, if Date-sama says…"
"All right, all right," Miyadate grumbles, cheeks turning pink as he glances at Sakuma and Sanada openly watching them. He tugs on Watanabe's sleeve. "Come on, let's take a bathroom break and then you can try again."
"Okay," Watanabe agrees readily, letting Miyadate tug him to his feet and not letting go of his hand even once they're upright.
Sanada gives a wistful little sigh as they leave, and Sakuma rolls his eyes.
"If you'd just confess…" Sakuma starts, but Sanada cuts him off with an English question, and in Sanada's world that means he really really doesn't want to talk about it, so Sakuma lets it go.
After fifteen minutes, Sanada wonders where the pair of them got to and suggests that maybe they weren't actually going to the bathroom, and Sakuma beats his head on his practice book several times.
"I really just don't see the problem at all," Sakuma complains to Fukasawa at their next photoshoot. Not that he's a particularly helpful Snowman, romantically, it's just who Sakuma happens to be paired with for the "Let's be Fighting! Balloons~" photoshoot.
Fukasawa whacks Sakuma in the face with his balloon and grins when the cameras snap accordingly.
"They'll work it out sooner or later," Fukasawa shrugs when the photographers switch over to tormenting Iwamoto and Abe.
"We said that three years ago," Sakuma points out. "We said it two years ago and last year, when Sanada had the growth spurt and then Nozawa did, when Hasshi left chocolates in both their lockers with each other's names on them, and when Nozawa saved Sanada from Kamenashi-kun that one time."
"What's your point?" Fukasawa tilts his head.
"My point is," Sakuma rolls his eyes and whacks Fukasawa with his own balloon, "that left to their own devices, I don't think they WILL ever figure it out, and then Sanada's head will explode from pent-up feelings." Sakuma pauses. "Hopefully his head."
"Trust me, everything besides his head has a regular outlet," Fukasawa assures wryly. "Maybe instead of the thing about the condoms, Koyama-senpai should start having talks with juniors about finding better hiding places."
Both of them pause to shudder, and in the silence Abe whines plaintively for Iwamoto to stop hitting him already, since the photographers are gone.
"So anyway," Sakuma continues, "I don't get it."
"Poor innocent leader," Fukasawa croons, leaning over him and patting his head like a grade-schooler. "So young and inexperienced in the ways of love."
"Fuck off, I'm like two weeks younger than you, asshole." Sakuma shoves Fukasawa back, then grunts when Fukasawa whaps him with the balloon again.
"Mmhmm, well, hands up if you've ever made out with Nokkun." Fukasawa lifts the hand with the balloon up to shoulder height and waits expectantly. After a second, Sakuma puts his hand up too.
Behind Fukasawa, Iwamoto puts his hand up and then grabs Abe's hand to force it up too.
"Oh," Sakuma says, maybe seeing a little. He thinks about what Sanada said earlier, and the sad way he said it. "You mean, that's just fooling around."
"Yup," Fukasawa lets his hand drop and then slaps Sakuma's ass with the balloon on the way by. "So if Sanada wants more than that, that's a different story, ne."
"Hikaruuuuuuuu," Abe whines, more urgently, and Sakuma gives up on his thoughts to go rescue their manager from abuse.
"Your exams are two years away!" Miyadate exclaims, pointing towards the door. "Out!"
"Please?" Abe makes big, desperate eyes at Miyadate, and when that fails, at Sakuma. "Pleeease? Leader, you have to let me stay, Hikaru and Nokkun won't leave me alone, and I have to get this homework done and…"
"Aaaaabe," Nozawa calls sweetly as the door swings open, and Abe flattens himself against the table and grips the edges like he's afraid to be dragged away physically. "Leave the big kids alone and come play already, like a good kouhai."
"You can't leave me with them," Abe tries one more time. "They scribbled KAT-TUN lyrics in my science notebook! I nearly got expelled for inappropriate sex comments!"
Nozawa strolls into the room, unconcerned about Abe's complaints, and hangs over Sanada's shoulder to see what they're working on, a casual arm around Sanada's neck. "Still English, na. I'D LIKE TO LOVING, and all that."
"Yeah," Sanada says weakly, adoration plain on his face. Nozawa hardly seems to notice as he gives Sanada's hair a rough tug and then reaches down to snag Abe by the collar. "Come on, kouhai, LET'S ROCKIN' ALL NITE."
He drags Abe out the door, struggling the whole way, and the door swings closed behind them.
"Don't even say it," Sanada says, with such vehemence that Sakuma blinks. He turns to find Sanada glaring at the table; Miyadate and Watanabe have their heads bent over Watanabe's latest practice test, not paying them any mind at all. "If you tell me to confess one more time, I'll—"
"You aren't allowed to confess," Sakuma cuts him off.
"I just told you—" Sanada blinks. "What?"
"You're the one who wants to go to university so badly," Sakuma snaps at him, "and instead of focusing on it, you spend all your time moping around over him like a lovesick girl! We're doing English, and you're taking that practice test again, and until you can goddamned pass it, you aren't allowed to confess to Nokkun or say one more goddamned word about him, got it?!"
"But—" Sanada starts.
"English!" Sakuma orders. "Now!"
"Got it," Sanada says, hiding his face in his study book.
"I got a forty-five out of fifty!" Watanabe shouts, making both of them jump. "YAY! It's thanks to Date-sama!" And then he seizes two fistfuls of Miyadate's T-shirt and yanks him forward for wet and rather long thank-you kiss.
"Yay," Miyadate echoes weakly once he's been released, eyes slightly glazed. Watanabe is flipping to the next chapter of his review book, happy as Tackey-senpai in Kabuki drag.
"Twenty-eight out of fifty," Sakuma says, handing back the paper.
"Whyyyyy," Sanada wails. "I studied all the things! But there's always more things! What am I, a wizard?! Date, help me."
"Talk to Eigo-sama over there," Miyadate grumbles, his original excitement on Watanabe's behalf having since degenerated into jealous frustration. They both look over to where Watanabe is bopping his head happily to his iPod while he scribbles practice exercises in his notebook. "He says American pop helps."
"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard," Sakuma speaks up. "And you, did you really study? You haven't been cheating, have you?"
"No," Sanada snaps, "I've barely talked to Nokkun in three days even, because all I do is study this stupid English book!"
"Good, then let's go over your wrong answers," Sakuma says, and Sanada sighs, but slides his chair closer to look at the answers in Sakuma's book at the same time as the questions in his own.
Ten minutes go by peacefully, and then the door opens and Nozawa's head pops in.
"Hey—" he starts.
"Go away," Sakuma says. Sanada starts to lift his hand up to wave, and Sakuma slaps it. "No interruptions!"
"Shoo!" Sakuma gives Nozawa his best Leader Glare, and Nozawa shoos, miracle of miracles. He looks back at Sanada. "Ready?"
Sanada's expression wavers for a few moments, and his eyes dart towards the door, but then they come back to the text book and he sets his mouth in a determined line. "Let's try it again."
Miyadate looks impressed and opens his mouth, but shuts it when Sakuma switches the Glare to him.
Beside him, Watanabe picks up a second pencil to start the drum solo.
It takes three more days and half a dozen near misses, but finally Sakuma puts down his pencil with a sigh.
"Again?" Sanada groans. "Leaderrrr…"
"You passed." Sakuma holds up the paper with a 62% circled at the top, and Sanada's mouth works wordlessly for a few seconds, before he shrieks in glee. He grabs Sakuma in a wild hug, crushing the paper in between them. Watanabe and Miyadate look on in interest.
"Hi," the door opens and Nozawa takes half a step inside, "not to interrupt, but…" he trails off when he sees Sanada squeezing Sakuma tightly. His eyes flash and narrow. "Oh. I really am interrupting."
"Nokkun!" Sanada crows, releasing Sakuma to gasp for air and is out of his chair like a shot. "I passed! I passed!"
"You—" and then Nozawa's eyes open wide as Sanada grabs him by the shirt and kisses him full on the mouth.
Miyadate and Sakuma stare; Watanabe cheers and applauds. Neither Sanada nor Nozawa seem to notice.
When Nozawa finally pushes Sanada back, lower lip puffing up and slick, he stares at him for a long moment with dark eyes before declaring, "You're my boyfriend, got it?" as if he expects Sanada to put up a fight.
Sanada's face lights up like KAT-TUN's pyrotechnics, and he's barely said "OKAY" before Nozawa is dragging him out of the room with possessive hands.
"Oooh," Watanabe elbows Miyadate, "bathroom break, ne."
"Shush, you." Miyadate pushes at him a little, making Watanabe's knowing grin just get a little wider. "And you," he says to Sakuma, "that was your plan all along, wasn't it? I thought it was reverse psychology, like Miyata-kun, but it was Nozawa you knew would crack first."
"Well," Sakuma shrugs, "Sanada wasn't ever going to confess at the rate we were going, so…I thought he might come to his senses if I took away his favorite toy for long enough."
"Mm, good job, Leader," Watanabe approves. "Leader's pretty cool, isn't he?"
"Thanks, but…" Sakuma eyes the look Watanabe is giving him. "Why are you looking at me like that?"
"Say," Watanabe wraps an arm around Miyadate's neck and pulls their heads close together, blinking up at Sakuma through long lashes, "let's have Leader help us out too."
"Ooh," Miyadate grins in return, "with homework, right?"
"No, I'd rather fool around with him," Watanabe answers, making Miyadate slap a hand to his forehead.
And on that note, Sakuma officially calls an end to this meeting of the official Snowmen 'Let's Get into University Yay!' study group.