so i went out to panera to have early lunch with a friend and write a little and wait for them to call. So I wait. and I wait and wait, and then i call their cell phones and nobody answers and then i waiiiiiiiit, and now it's 6pm when i know full-well that nephew's dinner time is 4:30-5. FINALLY i get my mother to pick up her fucking cellphone and she's like "oh, we went to dinner. your father said you were going to panera with [friend]."
me: "for LUNCH. FIVE HOURS ago."
mom: "o-oh. well, we're almost done..."
me: "yeah, thanks, no shit. I'll go get my own food like an adult then."
so I go to the grocery store and stomp around a little, looking around at things that I don't really want to eat and certainly don't want to make for myself, and my phone rings again, and it's my mother. I know there's nothing she's going to say to make me less pissed off, so I should have just not answered, but I do. and she's like do you want us to get food to bring to you, and i'm like NO, i'm already at the grocery store.
me: "the food is not at all the point, clearly, you think I didn't want to see [nephew] too? I don't even know where you went, where are you?"
[short silence, and I knew she knew i was going to be furious and i should have not have asked]
and that is when I flipped my shit right in front of the packaged meats, surrounded by people and everything, but fuck if i cared. I try not to yell at my mother, even when she's retarded like this, because it's not nice and I will feel bad for upsetting her, and it really is my father's fault because he asks you yes/no questions and gets your answer wrong 75% of the time no matter how clear you are, but this was just too far.
mom: "your father said--"
me: "now just hold on a fucking second. You went out to dinner, with [NEPHEW], to FRIENDLYS, and you didn't think you should FUCKING CALL ME?! you, yourself, really fucking THOUGHT THAT?"
mom: "we could--"
me: "I DONT WANT YOU TO BRING ME ANYTHING, I WANTED YOU TO CALL ME TWO HOURS AGO AND I'M ALREADY AT THE FUCKING GROCERY STORE."
also, when I get really angry, I cry, so I'm already shaking and people are edging away from me, and my mother tries to distract me with talk of dad buying us pizza for drama night tomorrow night, and it takes everything in my power not to tell her exactly what both he and she can do with her fucking drama night pizza.
me: "just forget it, I'll get something to put in the crockpot."
mom: "I could--"
me: "no don't do anything." *hangs up*
and then i bought a package of ground meat, under the [mistaken] impression that I had a hamburger helper mix at home, and slunk out of the store, trying not to cry too obviously before I got out because 2.5k of my students work there. I'm sure my mother is doubly upset because I didn't let her 'make up' for it, but since she fucking can't, I don't care.
ps - homemade hamburger helper sucks.