This morning,at about 8:35am, my mother calls me and is like "Aren't you going to work today?" And I'm like, "Huh? Of course I am". She then points out that it is after 830 and I dropped the f-bomb and hung up on her. I then called work and got Kathy's voice mail, and got dressed and out the door in like 7 minutes, pausing only to make sure that I still have three Harrys. Unshowered, but out the door.
Outside, I discovered they have blocked off most of the road in front of my house to one lane, and I can't figure out which way the lane is going. So I pull out quick, hoping nobody is coming and nearly die. But this eliminates any need for caffiene.
At work, everybody says hi like nothing is different, including my boss, and I am led to believe that if i had just rolled in and said nothing, nobody would even have guessed i was late.
At work, the scene quickly degenerates into chaos, as a bomb scare occurs across the street in one of the dorms, and security takes over our office as their base of operations. Real police arrive, with a dog, and eventually some bomb/SWAT team. They're yelling into their walkie-talkies and commandeering phone lines, and Dianna stops by Carol's desk where I am stationed to mention that I might want to call home because we're about to be on the news.
two hours later, it turns out that the bomb scare was caused by a mysterious ticking package, which after much scrutinizing and dog sniffing, is revealed to be a present from somebody's mother, who mailed them some sort of drum toy with the batteries already in it. Good job, boys.
The police then went to storm the Post Office, to demand an explanation for how the ticking package got delivered in the first place.
People keep trying to usurp my lunch space next to the spare computer, but i'm having none of it. I'll be eating my wanton soup right here next to the livejournal, thanks very much.